Crypto was dumb in 2024—like, really dumb. This year’s meme coin supercycle spawned the most bizarre characters the industry has ever seen, which is saying a lot, and conferences had us cringing weekly, all while politicians begged on their knees for the crypto vote (or at least its money).
And with this, we’ve enjoyed some of the dumbest moments ever inscribed on the perfectly distributed, immutable, uncensorable Blockchain of Life. From a meme coin developer setting himself on fire to promote his meme coin (#6, below) to FARTCOIN itself piercing a billion-dollar market cap (a late breaker that we didn‘t even count, but Stephen Colbert did), this year was truly something all of us can be proud of. These are the moments that define us, and which we can retell endlessly to our children, and our children‘s children, all of whom will doubtless be basking in the generational wealth we created in 2024, and beyond.
To commemorate crypto‘s awesomely idiotic year that was, we’ve randomly gathered an unranked list of 69 of the Dumbest Moments of the Year.
1. Meme coin mammories
LIVEMOM may be peak crypto degeneracy. Image: Kick LivestreamAn alleged mother joined her alleged son on a livestream to shake her boobs, begging viewers to invest in her son’s real meme coin.
“Do you wanna see him pour milk over these 36DDs?” she asked, noting—in case we weren’t already horrified enough—that her son “actually suckled on these. Now he’s going to get to pour milk on them.”
2. Getting cheeky
The viral success of LiveMom kick started a live streaming meta where meme coin devs would do stupid shit to boost their Pump.fun tokens—some would call it performance art.
One dude tied his hands so he couldn’t dump on investors, another claimed to have no arms at all (before he revealed them and sold everything), and a third dev said he had kidnapped someone. We wish that was the worst of it, but it definitely wasn’t: one guy lost his tooth while boxing, and another genius simply streamed their spread ass cheeks.
3. Making a lot of Mollah
Since the release of the Bitcoin whitepaper in 2008, people have wondered who Satoshi Nakamoto is. In October, one man stepped forward claiming to be the real deal.
British-Asian macroeconomist Stephen Mollah said he had been trying to reveal his true identity for some time but people kept stopping him. At the event (which he charged an entry fee of £500 for) he also claimed to have created the Twitter logo, ChatGPT, and the Eurobond, a type of debt.
Mollah rambled for over an hour, eventually claiming that he would move Bitcoin from the Genesis block “very soon” but he had to prepare for it. (Sadly, this still hasn’t happened.) When diving through his Twitter account, we found a spree of 2018 posts calling out all of the “Faketoshis” out there accompanied by some interesting images.
4. See the kitty? Pet the kitty. No, not that kitty…
Solana meme coin factory Pump.fun has been the home to some of the most jaw-dropping, idiotic moments in crypto. A case in point was when degens started trading a coin based on an “invisible cat” called Kieth… it’s just a photo of an empty room. And yes, it’s spelled that way.
5. Slerf’s up!
Image: Slerfsol on TwitterA developer accidentally burned $10 million worth of pre-sale tokens raised for the about-to-launch Slerf meme coin—rather than sending them to pre-sale participants. What happened next? The token shot up to a market cap over $700 million, of course.
6. Florida man says to Slerf dev hold my beer, burns self to pump token
TruthorDare dev after being lit on fire. Images: Screenshots from Kick, Telegram, and Twitter live streams.A Florida meme coin dev set himself on fire in an attempt to pump his token. It worked, and the token spiked over 2,000 to a market cap of $2 million in just a few hours. But he was hospitalized with third-degree burns and couldn’t sell, due to the intense medical attention he immediately required. Once he recovered, he couldn’t properly use his hands and claimed his phone’s face ID didn’t recognize him.
Months later, he quit the project claiming he was taken advantage of. His biggest regret? Not selling.
7. Does this ass make my tattoo look fat?
Hop doesn‘t regret his tattoo mistake Image: Twitter @HopDuneskiA Gigachad investor decided to get his Solana meme coin’s contract address tattooed… but he spelled it wrong.
8. Does this hair make my head look fat?
A crypto degen started to collect his girlfriend’s hair, one strand at a time, placing them on a styrofoam mannequin head. As day two dawned, budget airline Ryanair reposted the account suggesting that the owner ought to fly to Turkey for a hair transplant, which apparently is a thing there. Of course, the token skyrocketed over 470 as it garnered more mainstream attention.
9. Unreality TV
A tour of the “Solana Villa,” part of a crypto reality TV show, went viral this year simply because it was so obnoxious.
“Check out this helipad. If you don’t have this, you’re poor. HA HA speed tour!” the influencer said, showing off an Airbnb property.
10. Remilia King
Remember Joe Exotic (the Tiger King)? Remember when he joined an NFT community called “Retardio” out of the blue? And then got airdropped a DeGod? Nah, didn’t think so.
11. Gold medal grifting
Caitlyn Jenner. Image: ShutterstockCaitlyn Jenner (inventor of the tokenized Olympic medal ploy!) kick-started a whole celebrity meme coin meta. What was particularly dumb was that Jenner launched a token on Ethereum the same week she launched her initial meme coin on Solana. The new token claimed to have the goal of supporting Donald Trump’s presidential campaign. Months later, both tokens had crashed below $1 million market caps.
12. This little Iggy never went to market
Caitlyn Jenner lashes out at Sahil Arora, the person behind her JENNER token. Image: Twitter + Sahil Arora.Part of the reason Caitlin Jenner wanted to relaunch her celebrity project was because she claimed to have been “scammed” by the person who helped her create it: Sahil Arora. Arora made a name for himself this year as the mastermind behind countless short-lived celebrity projects and the odd Twitter hack.
That’s why it was so dumb that people fell for his trap by sending $380,000 to a pre-sale wallet for an Iggy Azalea token that that disavowed by Ms. Azalea. One pre-sale participant said that Arora had “lost all his rep” as a result.
13. Who’s your DADDY?
Andrew Tate announces a world tour. Image: Andrew TateWho can forget the heartwarming story of Andrew Tate, who in July was allowed to leave Romania while he awaited trial on charges of alleged human trafficking, rape, and forming a criminal gang to sexually exploit women? (All of which he denies.)
Upon hearing the news, Tate immediately announced a “global tour” for DADDY, a Solana token he’d been promoting to flip Iggy Azalea’s token MOTHER. Problem was, though Tate announced his tour would take him to “Tokyo, Dubai, [and] Miami,” he wasn’t allowed to leave the European Union.
Tate, who’s still awaiting trial, has denied the charges.
14. No, Iggy: Vitalik isn’t keeping your gas money
Iggy Azalea at her Motherland Ranch event. Photo: Iggy AzaleaOK, we love Iggy Azalea, who is our SCENE Person of the Year, because she launched her own token and could be the only celebrity to actually keep supporting her project (MOTHER) months after launch. But it‘s not all been smooth sailing for her.
In response to criticism from Ethereum co-founder Vitalik Buterin, the Australian singer questioned what he’s doing with ETH gas fees. This caused Crypto Twitter to clown Azalea since these fees don’t touch Buterin’s wallet—they feed back into the Ethereum ecosystem. She was younger then and we believe better educated now!
15. Crypto’s got ass…
Su Zhu throwing cash on a stripper. Image: TwitterAzalea upped the ante by hosting a stripper-filled party in Singapore, where some of the most degenerate clips of the year were born… which is saying a lot. Some examples:
- Founder of the bankrupt hedge fund Three Arrows Capital, Su Zhu, throwing cash at a girl twerking on him.
- DeGods President Sunny, dropping a girl he was holding in the air while dry humping her.
- Some dude getting super horny with a stripper covered in cash as his bros cheered him on.
16. …But Ethereum’s got talent!
Crypto conferences are usually serious events, filled with lengthy talks about blockchain technicalities and ever-imminent mainstream adoption. But at Token 2049: Singapore, Buterin decided to spin it up with a little crypto sing song—very much reminiscent of his 2019 rap.
“It’s mathematical. No more double spend, it‘s encryptable,” he sang onstage. “A new form of wealth begins.”
17. Buying tokens like these is insane!
Insane Labz, an Arkansas-based supplements company known throughout the MMA and Barstool Sports world, allegedly paid a group of online trolls to impersonate celebrities, fool its investors, and pump its token. And the scheme worked—until it didn’t. The trolls impersonated UFC President Dana White, MMA legend Nate Diaz, and social media sensation Hasbulla to hype up the LABZ token in the company’s Telegram group.
“We just did it for a laugh that got a bit out of hand,” one of the impersonators told Decrypt.
Dana White apparently hopped on FaceTime with the LABZ team. Image: Telegram.18. Simping for rug pulls
As an industry full of incels, virgins, and generally lonely men, it‘s no surprise that thirst trap pump-and-dumps became commonplace this year. The recipe was simple: be a girl or know a willing one, create a Pump.fun token, wear few clothes, livestream, then sell all your tokens once a few people buy in. Easiest money you’ll ever make.
19. Drugging for rug pulls
It was a banner year for drug addicts using the blockchain. First we had Meth’d Up Dev that, you guessed it, did meth on a livestream to pump his token. Then, we had Crack Head Dev who—actually, you didn’t guess it—overdosed on fentanyl while livestreaming. He later faked his death before becoming a full right-wing, racist Twitter personality. Who says there are no second acts in life?
Finally, we wrapped up the year with Meth Girl, who struggled to gain much traction since her Twitter accounts kept getting banned. Still, you go Meth Girl!
20. Currying for rug pulls
Image: TwitterAn enterprising fellow set up a meme coin for a curry stall in Lahore, Pakistan. But Decrypt did some digging, and it turned out the stall owners weren’t getting any money made from the token. So the streamer stopped the stream, and the CURRY coin tanked 92 in just a few hours. You‘re welcome, Curry Guy.
21. Jumping the frog
Image: Flog Team TelegramFlog the Frog (FLOG) was one of the most-hyped meme coin launches of the year due to its impressive artwork and influencer support. But its core team accidentally dumped on investors after an embarrassing miscommunication.
“DUMP IT,” project manager Breezy said in the leaked team chat, meaning to sell just a small percentage. Once he saw the token crash 91 in just one minute, he wrote, “Bro, did you sell it all?” Pyro, who was in control of the team funds, responded, “YES YOU SAID DUMP MY BRO.”
“You’re a fucking idiot,” Breezy explained. Fortunately for the artist, Flog relaunched as Fwog, ultimately becoming one of the more successful meme coins of the year.
22. Jumping the squirrel
PNUT is a meme coin based on social media sensation Peanut the Squirrel. Image: ShutterstockPoor, Peanut the Squirrel. Only the good die young: The rodent, suspected of having rabies, was a general election meme—and, of course, meme coin. PNUT saw $150 million in daily volume in November, and became one of the largest meme coins by market capitalization.
In a tragic post-mortem twist, it was revealed that Peanut never had rabies and was murdered for nothing. RIP little buddy, may your meme coin live on and your memory be a blessing.
23. But wait! The squirrel coin lives!
Less than a month after the story of the not-rabid but very dead Peanut the squirrel captivated a world gone mad, the rodent’s owner—apparently miffed that carpetbaggers got rich off his personal tragedy—launched his own token. Never mind that “the PNUT community” supposedly donated $50,000 to the owner.
"The fact that people wanna make money off this is nothing short of despicable," the bereaved owner stated in a Twitter video, before pivoting to launch the token called JUSTICE. Sadly, there was no justice for the JUSTICE token, which died deader than the fucking squirrel.
24. The father, the son, and the holy chicken
Lord Fishnu sitting in some broth. Image: Church of the Smoking Chicken Fish.This year spawned a religion with followers worshipping a raw chicken with a fish head smoking a cigarette called “Lord Fishnu.” But that’s not the dumbest moment.
Known as the Church of the Smoking Chicken Fish, the meme coin-based religion baptizes followers in what’s called a “brothism.” Normally this is just done by reading out the “10 chickemandments” on Twitter Spaces, but one follower took it a step further by reading them aloud in a bath, while fully dressed, and with raw chicken on his head.
And that’s not even the dumbest moment: the church was planning on opening a physical space in Marfa, Texas.
25. And, even that wasn’t the dumbest moment
A few months later, the church’s leader Pastor Kelby went rogue and started using his influence over the religion to take payments and shill micro-cap meme coins. In turn, he got banished from the church.
Does this throw the physical church plans into turmoil?
